tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post4993175165534709977..comments2024-03-15T23:39:29.134-08:00Comments on Scribbit | Motherhood in Alaska: Teaching Children Responsibility: Is Your Room Clean?Scribbithttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03178711182424809035noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-36324551295627864842010-05-25T19:46:19.501-08:002010-05-25T19:46:19.501-08:00Great article! i really like this article because ...Great article! i really like this article because it gives us more knowledge of being cleanliness. This is also the best thing that we should teach our children a responsibility, to clean there own room. and i also believe in that saying cleanliness is next to godliness. and aside from that we are not easly get diseases. If we always clean.:) keep up the good work. thanks for a such wonderful information:)Bernardita Infantehttp://www.buymeatoy.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-62200838183656440212007-06-21T07:13:00.000-08:002007-06-21T07:13:00.000-08:00I've tried this in the past and it worked quite we...I've tried this in the past and it worked quite well. My son didnt want to put away all his hot wheels cars so I said to him that whatever doesnt get put away gets taken away. He put everything away. <BR/><BR/>I like the bag idea. I think we would use a rubbermaid tub.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-69751915884152385962007-06-18T16:49:00.000-08:002007-06-18T16:49:00.000-08:00I live with 3 people who have ADHD bigtime. We hav...I live with 3 people who have ADHD bigtime. We have a laundry basket in each common room and that's where their stuff goes when it gets in the way of cleaning or relaxing. When it gets full, I let them know and they either empty it or I do - on their bed or in my dh's case, on his side of the our bed. It's not meanness on my part. I do it because they've told me that they want me to do it so that they'll notice it and put it away. And they do, or they don't have room to sleep. The kids' rooms are pretty messy, but they use several laundry baskets to contain stuff and put them in the closet when they have guests over. Sometimes, we'll all decide that there's just too much STUFF in their rooms, hoe it out, give some of it away and put some of it in the garage for later. I wash the clothes, dry them, fold them and put them on the folding table. They either find them there and wear them or put them away. I don't care which they do as long as they wear clean clothes. My son (17) does his own laundry, but I often throw some of his in with ours, because he'd do the same for me. I try to remind myself that our relationship is more important and will last longer than stuff does. That's all that clutter is: someone else's clutter where I don't want it. My stuff, as George Carlin would say, is MY STUFF. Their stuff is - well, listen to the cd. I found you via the COFL.<BR/>Shine On,<BR/>LillAdminhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05416333739132261312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-59947882715987098282007-06-16T08:37:00.000-08:002007-06-16T08:37:00.000-08:00What would you do about a husband who is worse tha...What would you do about a husband who is worse than the kids???????? If I took every piece of clothing my husband didn't throw in the hamper, every book & paper he left out, he would still never change. If anyone has coping strategies on that, I'd take them. But at least if you succeed with your sons, you know you are doing your daughter-in-law some major favors!<BR/><BR/>This is my first visit to your blog. It's great! I will probably stop by again.Natalie C.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10463944619586110995noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-78827163519433612592007-06-14T23:50:00.000-08:002007-06-14T23:50:00.000-08:00When I discover disorder in their bedrooms all act...When I discover disorder in their bedrooms all activity stops until order is regained. Late for a meal? too bad. Late for school? too bad. Late for bedtime story-time? too bad. They only have beds and clothes in their rooms (no toys), so it doesn't take long to tidy them up.<BR/><BR/>Toys are all in the playroom. I've posted about this at <A HREF="http://adventuresindailyliving.blogspot.com/2007/04/toy-jail.html" REL="nofollow">Toy Jail</A>. When we discover we are often sending toys to jail, it is obviously time to thin the herd. Each kid gets a paper grocery bag and instructions to fill it with things to be given away.Suzannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04606454923510883186noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-10372342664285248672007-06-12T17:38:00.000-08:002007-06-12T17:38:00.000-08:00Adding this one to my list of future parent surviv...Adding this one to my list of future parent survival tips!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-34101853589384114222007-06-12T16:03:00.000-08:002007-06-12T16:03:00.000-08:00YES YES YES!! A woman after my OWN heart. I do th...YES YES YES!! A woman after my OWN heart. I do the throw it outside thing and the kids hate it. Mostly it's backpacks that get out there, but it drives them crazy.<BR/><BR/>As to the taking things away, I do this with laundry that is clean but mysteriously in the dirty bag. It's MINE. I've got to come up with some good ideas for the cluttery toys, too. I'll be looking forward to reading some conclusions from your end.The Estrogen Fileshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02995416882864545267noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-81751339360276116942007-06-12T14:08:00.000-08:002007-06-12T14:08:00.000-08:00Mary Alice: Apparently at this point in their cog...<B>Mary Alice:</B> Apparently at this point in their cognitive development, disorder is not dismaying.<BR/><BR/><B>Jenn in Holland:</B> As long as the door can shut and I don't have to see it, then we all get along.<BR/><BR/><B>M:</B> When my daughter (4 1/2) cleans her room or makes her bed without being asked I fall down on the floor in "surprise." I am just SO HAPPY that I can't contain my enthusiasm. 9 times out of 10 she will clean up her room just to have heaps of praise piled on her and see mommy fall down on the floor.<BR/><BR/><B>Cagey:</B> I do think that once kids get to a certain age - say tweens or teens, that their room should be to their level of cleanliness (the rest of the house should be to whatever standards YOU hold - not negotiable).<BR/><BR/><B>Amy:</B> My mom had to always keep her things tidy and hated it so when we were growing up, she let us do whatever we wanted in our room. There were moldy plates and cups and trash everywhere.<BR/><BR/><B>Morning Glory:</B> "The Saturday Box" ... Anything that was not put away or taken to their room when they went to bed got put in the Saturday Box and kept until Saturday. ... Now as teenagers, I gave up the fight and simply closed their bedroom doors.<BR/><BR/>I think these are some of the best ideas in the bunch, and others of you said about the same thing. Mary Alice, I love your way of saying it, that kids go through a stage when "disorder is not dismaying." That's great!<BR/><BR/>Now the good news -- during their teen years, one daughter was the "good girl" who did whatever she needed to do, the other daughter rebelled against everything asked of her, and my son's favorite way of cleaning was to shove it all into his closet. I learned to keep the door closed to the room of the rebel, whose floor was covered with clothes with (sometimes) dried pizza pieces or unfinished Colas under the layer of clothes. Nobody ever said raising teens was easy.<BR/><BR/>The rebel is now in her late 40's, married, with three children. All of her adult life, she has kept a beautiful house! She grew up. Granted, it doesn't always work out, but there is hope and I offer it to all of you.<BR/><BR/>Oh, for the record, my other two turned out to be neat adults, as well.Bonnie Jacobshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07813549471704485150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-74682098677162134592007-06-11T21:55:00.000-08:002007-06-11T21:55:00.000-08:00Wow, where would I start? Am I "cleanie" to use Sa...Wow, where would I start? Am I "cleanie" to use Sandra Felton's term? At heart I feel better in order than chaos but I don't see like "cleanies". Knowing this about 20 years earlier would have been a tremendous boost to my self worth. But that's life. I don't see because I grew up in such unbelievable domestic chaos that I developed a knack for tuning out and remembering to only bring a couple of generous, tight-lipped friends around the house.<BR/><BR/>So while all of us have struggled together to stay on top of the daily clutter, we wash and paint walls, we wash rugs every year (at least) because we like bare feet, we flip mattresses every month and so forth.<BR/><BR/>Like many other commenters we were more "rigid" in the younger training years and looser when the room was more their domain. Although seasonally all rooms got a mom cleaning to get stuff like pet hair out of the carpet margins, and reset the standards, etc.<BR/><BR/>We also figured out that too much stuff on the floor was a sign of too much stuff when we noticed that stuff on the floor had been moved out of the way to get to the desired toy/object. We also did not like toy chests for two reasons: they hold too much stuff and nothing can be found without pulling everything out.<BR/><BR/>We used to have "mad 15s". These were for emergencies when we couldn't bear to go to bed with the family room inundated. Generally it became a crazy race and when the bell went off everyone would be laughing on the floor. But it looked like civilization returned, at least.<BR/><BR/>Another tradition we developed was each fall to have a toy reduction. As they grew some toys were no longer appropriate, birthdays had brought new ones and Christmas would be bringing more with our extended families. So everybody went through and decided whether something was special to box and keep, pass down, toss if broken, or give away. Sometimes it was hard but usually they were relieved because on their shelves were the things that were meaningful, useful and findable.<BR/><BR/>As for laundry, I remained in charge but they each had a color-matching hamper and basket. Their clean laundry was sorted unfolded into their basket on the laundry table. It was their job to get it back to the room and into the drawers. Eventually, they were expected to keep laundry moving through the cycle and sort at the end. So they were familiar with the different steps but laundry was still common. Upon graduating from high school the graduate was responsible for doing his/her own laundry but could request a singular item join one of my like loads (if only used one dress shirt a week s/he could add it to our permapress load to save water). It was worth the little bit of water and electricity to not hear "but my favorite _____ isn't clean for tonight."<BR/><BR/>Over the years our goals and methods evolved as we got more experienced, but we never denied a child food as a consequence of cleanliness or neatness because we believe it sends the wrong message. Hungry children feel deprived and unloved not regretful of their actions; and they can develop lack of trust that the adults in their lives will provide for their needs. (However, willful unpleasantness at the table got them removed but in those very few cases the correlation between what they did and the consequences were more direct.)<BR/><BR/>And at the moment it looks like we're going backwards but we downsized, and people have been coming and going, and we got bunches of stuff from the grandparents that takes time to sort (and actually pitch). So don't show up unannounced for a while. And ditto on "forgive my book".Debhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16834029909046193413noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-30206469402927098742007-06-11T19:46:00.000-08:002007-06-11T19:46:00.000-08:00We call the mad bag the "Silent Butler." The Silen...We call the mad bag the "Silent Butler." The Silent Butler comes around to clean from time to time, and the toys disappear, usually to be donated. That's for stuff outside the bedroom. A is responsible for keeping his room clean (J is still too young). If A is unable or unwilling to keep his room clean and tidy, then I'm more than happy to do it for him and I charge $1/hour, minimum one hour. He gets no warning as to when I will clean his room; if he's lucky, I might mention his room is looking a bit unkempt. It's still a work in progress; we have sooo many issues with A to work on that bedroom cleanliness is somewhere below "please for the love of God get dressed 'cause otherwise you're going to school naked so help me." ; )Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06600711458051601834noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-66946316264733324452007-06-11T19:03:00.000-08:002007-06-11T19:03:00.000-08:00We always had a very clean house, and it definitel...We always had a very clean house, and it definitely rubbed off on me. I was accustomed to having things very clean, so I carried on the same way when I left home.<BR/><BR/>We lived overseas and had maids...I learned to clean by watching the maids. There is an art to it...speed cleaning, getting it done efficiently.Alexandrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12356420873078531863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-49939139640998101582007-06-11T17:50:00.000-08:002007-06-11T17:50:00.000-08:00When our girls were little, we had what we called ...When our girls were little, we had what we called "The Saturday Box". Anything that was not put away or taken to their room when they went to bed got put in the Saturday Box and kept until Saturday. At that point they received it back and had to put it away. Sometimes that would be their favorite book, toy, jacket, lunchbox, whatever. Sometimes they lost it on Monday and had to wait the whole week. It actually was a pretty effective tool for them as children.<BR/><BR/>Cleaning their rooms was expected, but they didn't have to be perfect. Just beds made and good walking space with clothes put away. I felt they did learn about cleanliness even though they didn't practice unclutteriness all the time.<BR/><BR/>Now.....as teenagers, I gave up the fight and simply closed their bedroom doors. They were both instructed in the same way and one daughter was tidy, one was not. The untidy one is still untidy in her own home. But there's love, laughter and a lot of fun in her home.<BR/><BR/>Sorry that got so long.someone elsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12524255841655400982noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-91060965817962183232007-06-11T17:37:00.000-08:002007-06-11T17:37:00.000-08:00I have actually used the "mad bag" with my oldest,...I have actually used the "mad bag" with my oldest, who is almost 4. It really does get her cleaning up.<BR/><BR/>What I really need to start doing is include it in our nightly bedtime routine. Since my kids are younger and thrive on routines, I should really be taking advantage of this.Amy Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16889460762363255735noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-67829398324277544902007-06-11T16:06:00.000-08:002007-06-11T16:06:00.000-08:00Bribery and corruption wins out here - they're sti...Bribery and corruption wins out here - they're still little though.<BR/>They have a schedule board with rocket shapes Velcrod in place for each daily job [chore]. Until each rocket 'lands' indicating completion then no playing or any other preferred activity is available.<BR/>Cleaning is a long way away for us, but we do attempt 'spill clean up.'<BR/>CheersMaddyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05828186178060722812noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-87458188857147769242007-06-11T14:49:00.000-08:002007-06-11T14:49:00.000-08:00The Mad Bag, another brilliant idea from Scribbit....The Mad Bag, another brilliant idea from Scribbit. So far my daughter loves to have things clean and even my two year son will help pick things up. However, I am definitely keeping this idea in mind.An Ordinary Momhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05497066145696617241noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-74772350348793170382007-06-11T13:29:00.000-08:002007-06-11T13:29:00.000-08:00Dang, your mom was HARD CORE! Throwing your stuff ...Dang, your mom was HARD CORE! Throwing your stuff on the lawn, that is unbelievable!<BR/><BR/>My mom had to always keep her things tidy and hated it so when we were growing up, she let us do whatever we wanted in our room. There were moldy plates and cups and trash everywhere. We ruined everything and she had a hard time with it, but it was our own stuff and she let us do that in our own room.<BR/><BR/>I am not at the stage where I have thought about it yet, but you have my wheels turning. I like the bag idea and think that is definitley something we could try....Or I could just start chucking crap in the snow (hee, hee)Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10635304837180578317noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-9390909320448490642007-06-11T12:25:00.001-08:002007-06-11T12:25:00.001-08:00I have used this idea with some success too. Clot...I have used this idea with some success too. Clothes are cleaned up almost all the time. Shoes, less often. I got a sly smile at the thought of tossing them in the snow. <BR/><BR/>Still, one child tends to be a pack rat, so sometimes we need to go through her room and decide together whether she is getting too old for some of her keepsakes.Marie N.https://www.blogger.com/profile/02358976552469177345noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-54974301945976595092007-06-11T12:25:00.000-08:002007-06-11T12:25:00.000-08:00YES! I have a "Mad Bag" of sorts, too. Whenever my...YES! I have a "Mad Bag" of sorts, too. Whenever my kids see me traipsing through the house with a box of any shape and size, they get really nervous. REALLY nervous. <BR/><BR/>We are having a garage sale this weekend while the kids are away with their grandparents.<BR/><BR/>MWA HA HA!!Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07570437173288571934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-46088140918882526402007-06-11T11:11:00.000-08:002007-06-11T11:11:00.000-08:00This works wonders on college roommates as well :)...This works wonders on college roommates as well :) Although more modified to a "if-your-stuff-is-in-the-community-areas-it-gets-relocated-to-your-bed-mold-and-all" type of rule. :)<BR/><BR/>It worked really great!Prahagirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06981815395425934085noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-18149954841174456862007-06-11T09:58:00.000-08:002007-06-11T09:58:00.000-08:00Julia is three and already seems to have a tendenc...Julia is three and already seems to have a tendency toward order and cleanliness. When I was a child, I did not. I was messy. My room was messy, but it was <I>my</I> room and I could keep it the way I wanted. It was my area and the mess had to stay there. There was trouble if it leaked out. But soon, I started to experience consequences of the mess. I stepped on my records and broke them. I couldn't find the pieces to my games. My friends didn't want to play in it when they came over. Soon, I got it and started to keep my room clean. It was a good lesson I've never forgotten.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-6554158323535959732007-06-11T07:28:00.000-08:002007-06-11T07:28:00.000-08:00Great ideas! It reminds me of your method of deal...Great ideas! It reminds me of your method of dealing with homework. Being responsible for oneself? What a novel concept! ;-)<BR/><BR/>I do think that once kids get to a certain age - say tweens or teens, that their room should be to their level of cleanliness (the rest of the house should be to whatever standards YOU hold - not negotiable). My exceptions would be dirty dishes. I will never compromise on that because 1) it's gross and 2) a bug magnet.Cagey (Kelli Oliver George)https://www.blogger.com/profile/13691589813815058981noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-54168249580260415142007-06-11T07:17:00.000-08:002007-06-11T07:17:00.000-08:00Your "mad bag" makes me sound like wimpy mom. I wi...Your "mad bag" makes me sound like wimpy mom. I will add, however, that I have a strict laundry policy. If it needs washing, it better be in the hamper on laundry day. I will not go through the pile of socks on the floor.<BR/>I've been impressed by how well La Petite keeps her room at college and at home on breaks. It's definitely a sign of growing up.Daisyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11647906900944224234noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-8520428626387446252007-06-11T06:51:00.000-08:002007-06-11T06:51:00.000-08:00We tried a toy jail, a big box inthe garage where ...We tried a toy jail, a big box inthe garage where toys that were left thrown about went. The result: they didn't really care and just found something else to leave laying all over thehouse. *sigh*Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-58221159305202800982007-06-11T06:37:00.000-08:002007-06-11T06:37:00.000-08:00Excellent idea. So far, the kids clean their rooms...Excellent idea. So far, the kids clean their rooms themselves and they do a fair job. Wild Thing's closet is the biggest problem for us.<BR/><BR/>I like the idea of the Mad Bag, but I fear I may lose my shoes if I'm not careful. Those things seem to walk all OVER the house.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-14194867.post-86371031898685968062007-06-11T06:15:00.000-08:002007-06-11T06:15:00.000-08:00My kids are too young for me to have a "system" in...My kids are too young for me to have a "system" in place yet, but I'm interested in hearing what everyone else does.<BR/><BR/>My personal experience is that I had a horribly messy room growing up, and I keep a reasonably clean house. I think that your friend's theory might not be so far from the truth, frankly. <BR/><BR/>At this point, I do elicit help from my 7-y/o son to clean up his room or the playroom. He does a fairly good job and is usually agreeable when asked. <BR/><BR/>My 4-y/o dd is allergic to cleanup, and it makes me crazy. I have to break it down in small tasks, and I usually do most of it myself.<BR/><BR/>I have no problem with toys left out "disappearing" after fair warning, and I might implement this in the future.Musings of a Housewifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09854615817486354491noreply@blogger.com