An Alaskan is someone who is comfortable with canvas, who pulls out the shorts when the thermometer hits 50, who thinks it's not a real pothole if you can still see the tire, and to whom antlers are a legitimate interior design option.
I was born and raised in
Second--we have kids. Quite a few, I think four at last count ranging in ages from 12 (our daughter Grace) down to Lillian at a fresh and exciting three years. Grace is all-girl and is presently into musicals. You know, like My Fair Lady, The Music Man, The Sound of Music. She goes around whistling songs like "
Lillian, being the youngest is of course rather spoiled but no one seems to care yet. Her latest thing is to go around the house with her legs bound together with rubber bands, hopping. Everywhere she goes it's hop, hop, hop (trip) hop, hop, hop. Her likes? Noodles and the front yard. Her dislikes? Cheese and the backyard (it has a child-proof fence).
There are a couple of boys in between, Spencer and David, which I've determined are God's reminder to us never to let our insurance lapse. I think the latest incident involved homemade water balloons courtesy a 300 box of Glad sandwich bags. But hey, if there's no skin grafts involved, then it's all good. Spencer is into writing, almost to the point of obsession and has an extensive collection of journals he's filled with stories, poems and pictures. As an example of his portfolio I submit his tribute to Andrew on Father's Day:
"The Best Dad"
(A Poem by Spencer)
The best dad is mine!
Just mine.
Not yours:
But my dads
the best. He plays
with me. And loves
me. But your dad
spoils you.
And gives things that
waist your time.
But my dad's
the best.
So, as long as you've got those two things in mind you pretty much have the picture. I could go into technicalities of socio-economics, religion, race, politics and food preferences (according to Andrew there are two kinds of people in this world: those who eat mushrooms and those who are sane) but we'll save that for later.
P.S. No, that picture isn't professional, it's taken in the living room with one of the boys' sheets draped behind us between the floor lamps. It was our Annual Family Photo for Christmas Cards (AFPCC) but my buddies at Wal-Mart pulled me aside when I came to pick up the prints and did a pat down because they thought I'd been infringing some professional photographer's copyright.
"Ma'am is this a studio portrait?"
"Really? You think this is professional? I'm flattered, but no--see the worn spots on the sheet?"
"It looks professional."
"Well I'm thrilled you think so but have you seen how blurry the three year-old is? Check her out, we couldn't get her to hold still--no professional would be able to charge for such a picture anyway!"
They didn't seem convinced but I got away with a warning and took mental note not get AFPCC prints at Wal-Mart again. Though it was flattering.
Technorati tags: Alaska, humor, family, motherhood
4 comments:
Thank you for visiting my site for Chance's birthday tribute. I've visited your site before, but just read this entry about your family today. It sounds like you have a great family! My husband, when we were first married, tried to talk me into moving to Alaska. My father was very sick at the time and I didn't want to be that far from Oklahoma! We have decided for our 20th anniversary we will take an Alaskan cruise. I've never been interested in a cruise other than in Alaska. One of my brothers and his wife took an Alaskan cruise - loved it - and he has visited at other times taking hunting expeditions. He says its beautiful! I hope some day to find out.
I've just stumbled on your blog via another one and already love it. My little sister lives in Anchorage and I miss her terribly. (Actually, my husband and I have several "transplanted" family members between Homer and Juneau.)
Thanks for all the smiles.
www.toneystories.blogspot.com
That was cute! Mom-on-the-run. My dd should play that one. Even with just one, I spend more time in the car than actually at home.
And the Walmart people have a good eye. You took a terrific pic. No heads cut off or anything!
i just read all the comments that ppl posted. really cool i just got eager to read your article. .
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