Monday, October 15, 2007

The Battle of the Spoons

Wait! Wait! Don't tell me! There's something different . . . you've done something with your hair?

Nope, but I've got me a new template! Like it? Jules from Everyday Mommy made the background graphic from a photo I took and I rather like the effect. And I'm official with my own logo now! Just like the big kids. Mugs, t-shirts and collector's buttons coming soon . . .

***

Dansk TorunWhen Andrew and I married I didn't give a lot of thought to the marriage ceremony. I had some basic ideas about where it should be and who was going to be there, that I ought to have a white dress and that we ought to have a reception but I really wasn't into a lot of the details that brides typically get into.

Dansk TorunAnd as for gifts, I didn't really care about matching dishes and towels, in fact I only registered for one item. One item because my Mom, thinking that her daughter should actually consider some of the details of setting up house, brought me some pictures of flatware patterns to see what my tastes were like. I saw the set of tableware pictured above from Dansk and fell head over heels for the sleek, contemporary look. What cinched the deal was that uber-cool knife that sits up on its edge like so. I'm a sucker for clever designs so that was the flatware for me.

In typical bride fashion I didn't consider the price, which turns out was not unsubstantial. Dansk is a quality name and each place setting cost more than my food bill for the month, but a long-time family friend (whom I think of every time I pull out the utensils) gave us settings for eight and the kindness and generosity of the gift touched me. Every time we've ever had anyone over for a meal we get comments on those knives because they're completely cool--if a woman can have a love affair with her flatware, this would be it.

Fast forward a dozen years to when I'm a mother of four wonderful children who need to learn independence and the value of work so what do I do? I assign Spencer to handle the job of doing the dinner dishes. As an 8 year-old boy is prone to do he hurries through his job like a hurricane until one day, rather by accident, I discover that one of my eight teaspoons is missing. Gone. Vanished.

I was upset but it wasn't the end of the world. After all, who knows what happened to it, even I could have accidentally lost it (yea, who am I kidding? Not likely). But it made me keep a close watch on my silverware and it wasn't too long before another one went AWOL. One by one the teaspoons disappeared until I was down to four. It was maddening. How were they disappearing? Why was it just the spoons? Who was responsible? It was as if someone were sneaking in the middle of the night and taking them one at a time just to see if they could tweak me over the edge of sanity.

I came down on Spencer, threatening him until he was afraid to do the dishes, convinced that he was being careless and throwing them away but on it went and I never found my spoons. I ended up replacing them to have a full set but wouldn't you know it was only another month before one disappeared. And then another. I replaced them but another vanished. I replaced it and it vanished again. It was like living with David Copperfield.

You're going to expect that I have a solution to the story, some big ending where I reveal how the spoons disappeared and that I now have all my spoons back in order but I didn't. Never figured it out and never solved the mystery. The saga settled down, I figured it was pointless to replace any more when they'd just go missing again. You might ask why we continued to use that set of flatware but I didn't want to buy a whole new set of junky stuff and use that for the rest of my life. Things like that are meant to be used so we use them. Or rather lose them.

Why didn't I put Spencer on another chore? Because my philosophy was that just because he's not good at a task doesn't mean he shouldn't have to learn how to do it properly. Stay there until you figure out how to do it right and all that. Besides, how did I know it's his fault?

Anyway, it has been about ten months since anything has disappeared and I've been breathing a sigh of relief that this nasty episode is past but wouldn't you know it, I happened to count the silverware last week only to discover that no, we haven't lost any more spoons, but a dessert fork is gone. WHAT?? Great, just great, we're starting Act II.

I'm thinking of installing a whole bunch of video cameras in the house just to solve the mystery because somewhere on this planet is a pile of my Dansk flatware. They're there and they're waiting for me. The truth is out there. Maybe my dishwasher contains a portal to another dimension, one that sucks Danish silverware from unsuspecting housewives. Maybe the Tooth Fairy is taking them, maybe they have an expiration date and after so many years spontaneously combust? Whatever it is, I'm doomed. I might as well just give it up and hand over the forks right now and save someone some effort at losing them.

Maybe I should just switch to plastic and call it good before this kills me.

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69 comments:

Robin said...

OMG, when I got married (in 1991) a group of my parents' friends sent us to Dansk to pick out flatware as an engagement gift and I desperately wanted that very same set! I loved how the knives stood up. They were a lot pricier than the rest though, so I threw in another style or two as a backup, and sure enough we got the backup. They did give us a very generous service for 12 though, and after all these years I really love the pattern I ended up with. Still, that standing up thing would have been very cool *wistful sigh*

PS Love the new look - very swish.

Veronica said...

The new look is fantastic.

Umm if you install camera's can you please let us know if you discover where your spoons are? I have a sneaking suspicion that it is a place filled with left socks and buttons.

Poppy Fields said...

We married in 1993 and my mom sent me flatware photos to choose from, and we chose the exact same Dansk style you have....I have your spoons :)

Meredith said...

It's always the spoons.

On another note, am I the only one who can't see a background graphic? The template looks white with the pretty cursive Scribbit at the top left. (I use IE7, if that helps.)

Erica Douglas said...

Love the new sleek look AND I'm VERY envious of your feed count, just noticed that :)

If I'm not being too nosy, I have wondered something for a while...
why haven't you moved your uber successful blog onto it's own domain?

Or is it coming soon :)

Mary Alice said...

Several years back when I had a fifth grade boy..I found two of my spoons in the dirt out under an azalea bush. I believe they were part of archeology excavation. You might look out in the yard.

CATHY said...

Love the look! I can't see the graphic either but look forward to seeing it soon.

Ken and Belly said...

Hi, I'm new here (thanks, Toneybabies). But I had a suggestion. Have you pulled out your silverwear drawer out of the cabinet and checked behind it (and possibly the other drawers)? I once found a couple of MIA spoons back there making friends with the dust bunnies.

dcrmom said...

OMG. I loooooooooooooooooove the new template. And thanks for naming me site of the week!!!! (Did you see my latest handbag I got on Saturday???)

Melissa Garrett said...

I'm a big fan of clean, easy-to-read templates, and I appreciate how user-friendly your site is. Everything is easy to find. *I had NO idea how many page views a month you get. And here I was thinking I was something special for getting 3,000! LOL!* Awesome job!!

girlymama said...

LOVE the new look!

I was shocked - SHOCKED - at how particular my husband was when we were registering for flatware. He didn't give two-hoots about anything else. But the flatware needed great debate. Perhaps because it could, technically, qualify as a tool.

lynnae @ from under the clutter said...

I love the new look!

Don't get me started on disappearing silverware! I'm not sure how it disappears, but we can't seem to hang onto it either....and spoons are the worst!

You have a great perspective!

susiej said...

Love the new look!

Lisa said...

I can't see the background either :(

It is so nice to love, love, love your flatware and dinnerware. I feel the same way about my Fiestaware. I love how each meal is different just b/c of those plates.

Coralie said...

First: LOVE THE NEW LOOK! WOW!

Also: Have you checked lunch boxes and your husband's car? My mother had this problem, and we all swore that we had no idea where they were going, until she realized we were taking them with our lunches, and not putting them back - and my Dad was as bad a culprit as we were. Just a thought. I just found two spoons in my diaper bag and I have NO IDEA how they got there.

Just a thought.

Summer said...

Oh my gosh, the missing spoon phenomenon has hit our place too. And growing up I remember my mom always complaining about missing spoons. You're right, it's almost always the spoons. Luckily my mom found out where hers went when she found the stash of empty frosting cans, spoons still inside, hiding in my brothers closet.

Amy Bennett said...

I can't see a background, it's just white :(

Summer said...

Oh yeah, and I like the new look. But I also can't see any background image. It's just white to me. I'm in Firefox right now.

My Ice Cream Diary said...

There are severeal known black holes that serve as recepticals for flatware. The one most likely to eat spoons is the garbage disposal. Maybe they are being thrown away so that you don't have to see the carnage. The other black holes are usually a patch of dirt in the back yard, under a child's bed, and little kids have been known to feed other black holes just because it is so much fun watching a spoon go through their favorite hole in the fence, down their favorite heater vent, in the back corner of their favorite cupboard. My guess is that someday you will move and find a plethora of spoons somewhere.

Jeana said...

First, LOVE the new look!

I have found flatware in the trash can before, after we ate on paper plates and the kids tossed the plate and fork together, not thinking about it obviously. I'm missing some flatware and I'm sure that's what happened to it.

Lisa Milton said...

Oooh, I like the new look. So crisp.

Amy said...

I love your new look! It is very clean and beautiful. You guys did a great job- way to go!!

Deb - Mom of 3 Girls said...

The new look is beautiful - I love it! :)

We've lost spoons over the years too although I realized that one culprit was having toddlers who didn't realize that metal spoons don't get thrown away with paper plates... I hope you solve the mystery, because now you've got me really curious!

Kelly said...

That would drive me absolutely crazy. Over the edge. Up the wall. Around the bend.

I can't believe you've managed to stop replacing and obsessing. Good for you. My OCD would not allow it.

The new look is classy, which is to be expected. You run a great blog, Michelle.

mayberry said...

The site looks great, Michelle -- congratulations!

As for the spoons -- on that one I'm stumped!

elaine@bloginmyeye said...

Love the logo! I just got a new masthead from Jules too. And I have that same DANSK flatware. LOVE IT! You may want to investigate Replacements Limited (www.replacements.com) as a source for those spoons that have gone missing.

The Lazy Organizer said...

I would be inspecting the garbage before it goes out. I love my flatware. The salad forks look like little musical instruments. And of course it is now a discontinued pattern. Lovely.

Scribbit said...

If anyone else can't see the graphic would you mind leaving a comment to that effect along with which browser you're using?

Marie said...

Those are very cool knives.

When I was little we disappeared quite a bit of flatware. We used it for backyard escavation, and a lot of it just got buried. You guys know anyone with a metal detector?

Heffalump said...

Can't see the background here either...
Our silverware disappearing goes in cycles...first it was forks, then spoons...I need to get new ones of both. The sad thing is that we had service for 8 in one style, plus a partial set in another style, and we are still hard pressed to find enough forks. How did we go from 32 forks to not enough for seven people?

Mrs. Flinger said...

I love the look! I'd say more but I have a baby in my arms grabbing things. And I don't mean spoons...

Matilda said...

We were married in 1996 and have the same flatware only I do keep mine in a chest and only bring it out for special occasions. Tell me... how does the finish hold up with regular use?

Rebecca said...

Love the new template!

laura said...

I love your new look!

We have had kid plates and teaspoons disappear... I have caught my toddlers throwing plates away a time or two, so I'm assuming the missing plates and teaspoons were inadvertently thrown away... Oh joy!

Scribbit said...

Mathilda, you might have the silver finish set rather than the stainless steel set I own (and which wears very well).

Lauri said...

I love the new look! It's beautiful!

As for silverware - let me know. I gave up on the real stuff. I keep buying Oneida sets when they are clearance after Thanksgiving and they keep vanishing.

An Ordinary Mom said...

The spoon thing would drive me bonkers!

I see a faint graphic on the upper part of the screen. What happened to your blogroll, awards, buttons and everything else, though? Are you opting to leave them off?

Pieces of Me said...

great look. Very chique!

sognatrice said...

Love the new look! I'm ready for a change myself--looking to simplify as well. Love it, love it, love it!

J. Lynne said...

I had this friend whose good silverware kept disappearing and she kept finding pieces of it in her husband's truck.

I live alone and last year I had to replace my flatware because I was down to two forks. However, I had twice as many spoons as I should have had. I'm convinced that the dishwasher was magically changing them.

Mrs. G. said...

Thank goodness it wasn't the knives!

ewe are here said...

Perhaps they're with all those socks that vanish mysteriously in the wash cycle....

Thea said...

Hey there, I can't see a picture either!

I just thought you were going for the minimalist look until I read I wasn't the only who was having problems!

crissybug said...

It is amazing how things just "dissapear". I do love the set though. We just have some cheap stuff from Oneida. One day I will get a nice set. :)

BTW...can't see the graphic on IE6, but when I pulled it up on Firefox...it looks great!

Ally said...

I've always heard that the Tooth Fairy is not to be trusted. I mean when she's in the house collecting a tooth, maybe she's casing the joint for a later heist. Don't know for sure. Just something to think about.

SabineM said...

Did you ever see the movie the BORROWERS? it explains where those "things" disappear to!
Love the new template! I thought I had landed on a different blog. I am bummed I missed the Saturday Giveaway, I was ..where else,a horse show!
I want both books. I was just talking with some girlfriends about the screaming! haaaaa
How is that book??

Fiddledeedee (It Coulda' Been Worse) said...

I love what Jules did with your new look!!!!

I, personally, have a set of Wendys Frosty Spoons (still in the wrapper) that I'm dying to break out for company.

Marie N. said...

Your new template is beautiful!

My flatware is not nearly so nice, but I too think of the generous wedding gift giver whenever I set the table.

I'm a few spoons short too, and I've not solved my mystery either.

I think that it was not really the dish that ran away with the spoon, but socks from the dryer.

Susan said...

At least it's not a knife that's missing. That would be more worrying. My problem is dropping silverware down the garbage disposal (as it's running) and I'm loading the dishwasher. So far, two teaspoons and one fork have been mangled. I still have them, but they're not pretty.
P.S. Great choice on the new look, Michelle. :)

Org Junkie said...

I'm unable to see the graphic either. Using IE here.

Laura

carrie said...

We have a monster that eats our teaspoons which we are so lovingly attatched to (I can't imagine who is so irresponsible to turn the garbage disposal on without first checking it). I've been looking for online deals ever since . . .and don't even get me started on our place settings, we've lost so many pieces.

Jen at Semantically driven said...

Congrats on the new look. I have no suggestions on missing things - sorry. I can't even keep a pair of socks together.

Katherine said...

When I was a kid, it was spoons and glasses and bowls that would disappear. Turns out my brother was having ice cream and chocolate milk and would stash the dishes under the sofa. Veritable treasure trove under there every few months.

Jen at Semantically driven said...

About the lack of the background graphic in IE - I like a challenge and did a quick search and think I've found the solution. In the CSS code for #wrap2 under the Page structure you need to add a space before the no-repeat so the code will then look like this:

#wrap2 {
background:url(http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e98/amitton/BackgroundLight.jpg) no-repeat left 0px;

See how it goes.

Stephanie said...

I was just thinking about missing spoons. Everyone talks about socks, but spoons disappear here regularly also.

Looking good with the new template.

Shalee said...

I haven't even read the post yet. I just wanted to say how much I adore your new look. That Jules is a keeper, that's for sure!

Sarah @ Real Life said...

It's The Borrowers. (remember that movie?) Our teaspoons are disappearing one by one, too. Luckily we only use the good stuff every once in a while, at least until the kids get older. My 2 year old has an affinity for throwing things away. It doesn't matter what, just anything.

BTW, I love your new design! Jules is working on one for me, too. I can't wait.

my4kids said...

I love your new template!!

I have suffered from the battle of the silverware for years and have given up on having a full set of them or matching ones for that matter at least until the children have grown and move out (if ever).

Le laquet said...

Love the new look - very grown up and professional! Have you checked the sand pit (if you have one) for the spoons? Spoons are great in a sand pit!

chelle said...

Ooooo love the new digs!!!!!

hehe we got silverware too, note to self kids must never do dishes :P

Corrie said...

When we moved into our first house, I needed something like a garden hand shovel to plant some pansies.

I unwittingly used my two large serving spoons from my flatware set - aaagh! I scratched them to bits. I still can't believe I didn't go out and buy a garden tool

Geo said...

Don't worry. You'll see them again in Heaven. But for now I weep with you!

Geo said...

P.S. Pretty new look.

The Not Quite Crunchy Parent said...

Wow! I love your new template. It's very clean!

Mary@notbefore7 said...

Loving the new look! Here's to hoping you find an entire set of silverware...all hanging out together :)

Theresa Bakker said...

You look fabulous. And your blog's not bad either. Yuk, yuk, yuk. Can't wait for the mugs.

Laura J. said...

My best friend's mom and dad asked me right before I got married, how many place settings I needed to finish out my service for 12 of Gorham's "Melon Bud" in 1992. She got me 7 or 8 place settings, plus pierced and solid serving spoons. Just like you, I think of them just about every time I open the flatware drawer ...

mopsy from lifenut said...

So funny, so true, and so universal.

I wrote my own Lamentation of the Spoons once---and ironically, it is being re-run today on my group blog!

Leslie said...

The new template is great! It fits you perfectly.

As for missing kitchen utensils - that's always my husband. Somehow, they're always in the car. I don't understand it.