Following Up

For those of you who tuned in two weeks ago I relayed a conversation my teen daughter and I had about some of the things that were happening in her high school. Turns out she watches a bit of television--okay a lot. In fact, if she probably deserves an honorary degree in broadcast and communications based on the number of school hours she's spent in front of a screen and judging from the amount of comments the post got I touched a nerve.

I hadn't exactly intended to, I was just frustrated with the situation and what can I do when I feel completely impotent but mouth off to the great and powerful Internet? But I thought you might be interested in what has happened since then.

First of all, the television thing is still going strong. In fact, her German teacher is probably the worst offender because she'll put in a DVD, switch it to the German language option and then let the machine run for days at a stretch and last week it happened again only this time they watched a German silent film.

Did you catch the irony? A silent film. They're not speaking English, they're not speaking German, they're not speaking at all. Seems like the perfect option for teaching German in the classrooom, ja wohl?

And then for the week of Thanksgiving her history teacher (if you remember the Shirtless Wonder I mentioned previously) spent Monday, Tuesday and part of Wednesday showing the class Glory as a wrap-up to their study of the Civil War.

This was the part that particularly interested me because I remembered the movie from the 80s and knew that it happened to be R-rated. We don't let our kids see R-rated movies and it was my understanding that the school district's policy was that no movie over PG was to be shown to students without parental consent.

So I sighed deeply and wondered if maybe it wasn't time to get involved.

The weird thing about me though is that I'm a complete wimp about confrontation. If the choice is fight or flight I'll take flight every time and though I tend to talk big I'm Jello when it comes down to addressing issues face to face. I might be angry or frustrated but as soon as I'm dealing with a human being with their own feelings and concerns I get rather nervous.

But I thought this time it was important so I wrote an email to the principal telling him I was concerned because it wasn't an approved movie and that they seemed to be watching an inordinate amount of television anyway. Then I might have mentioned somewhere in there that I also thought Mr. History Teacher was slightly creepy for his shirtless pictures and talking about his binging weekends (I think I might have left that part out of the previous post but yea, he likes to brag).

Well the principal wrote back and asked to speak with me. By that time my cowardice was kicking in and I seriously thought about dodging his call (how many times have I said we needed caller ID?) but I sucked it up and spoke with him.

He was nice enough and our conversation went something like this:

"I understand you're concerned about the movie Teacher X will be showing this week?"

"Yes, my daughter said it was a movie that I understood to be R rated."

"Well don't worry, it's actually an edited version of the movie that was put together especially by Pepsi for educational purposes." (and I'm quoting this line verbatim).

"Oh. Well if it's Pepsi . . . " (okay that part I didn't say though I wish I'd had the guts to deliver it with all the sarcasm it deserved).

While he was very nice and treated me politely I could tell that he saw absolutely nothing wrong with the idea of taking three days to watch a movie as the culminating activity for a study of the Civil War. While I'd concede grudgingly that showing a clip or two might be acceptable (or perhaps I should say it's at least not poisonous) I don't understand how watching Hollywood's shaky retelling of an historical event is better than reading Uncle Tom's Cabin, Andersonville or Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass. The class could spend the last days studying the works of Lincoln, creating a time line of events, studying the military figures or mapping the geography of the states. And if they had to watch something the Ken Burns' documentary on the Civil War is at least a better choice. There are so many other ways to have spent that three-day period and if the principal, a man trained in the field of education, couldn't see more profitable alternatives to Matthew Broderick sipping Pepsi for three days how was a conversation with a frustrated mother going to change any of that?

But the good news is that they're not showing R rated movies to the kids, if you want to look at it that way.

The principal assured me he'd speak to Teacher X about being more aware of propriety, not showing pictures of his tattoos, yada yada yada but to be honest it was a frustrating conversation. He was polite but seemingly without the same concerns, we were looking at the same picture but seeing two very different things.

However, ultimately I came away with an epiphany. She's going to have good teachers and she will also occasionally have duds but regardless of who is teaching her the responsibility for her education ultimately rests on me as her mother and on her as an individual. I've always believed that education begins in the home so it's up to me to make sure she's learning even if it means making up for what isn't happening in the classroom.

And now, I will leave you with one more thought:

It's not a real message but it's funny nonetheless, striking a blow for frustrated teachers everywhere.

Sponsored by Beau-Coup for unique baby shower favors.

Thai Beef Rolls

Busy? We were snowed in this weekend, the stuff started coming down on Thursday and by the time things were over Saturday morning I couldn't take my van out without getting stuck.

But it was actually kind of nice, once everyone was safe inside together I liked how cozy it felt and we played games and ate too much.

So we've been keeping on the "down low" as they say, just enjoying the winter and holiday and pretending that we don't have to go back to work tomorrow.

Here's my recipe for the week, these little sandwich wraps are easy and tasty. The only thing would be to make sure you make enough of the sauce because they're really good with the sauce drizzled on them. I bet you could even substitute the beef for leftover turkey if you wanted to give it a try. Couldn't be bad, could it?

1 1/2 tablespoons lime juice
1 tablespoon sesame oil
1/2 to 1 tablespoon finely minced ginger, depending on how hot you like it
2 teaspoons fish sauce
3/4 teaspoon sugar
4 10-inch flour tortillas
8 thin slices roast beef
2 cups shredded cabbage
1/2 cup julienned carrots

Combine the first six ingredients to make the dressing.

On each tortilla liberally brush some of the dressing then spread two slices of roast beef then divide the shredded cabbage and carrots between the the four tortillas. Serve with extra dressing if desired.

Sponsored by K & M Studios and photographer Megan Burgess

VTech Toys Giveaway

Hit any sales this weekend? We went skiing but I decided I wasn't brave enough to face the crowds and each year I do more and more online shopping.

I love being able to have things delivered to my door without having to find a parking space.

If you're starting into your shopping list VTech Toys have got gadgets for the munchkin on your list--check out the Jungle Gym Ride and Learn Giraffe Bike where kids can ride their "bike" and practice their shapes and other learning activities while they ride. Or the Cyber Pocket where you kids can play games with the touch panel and flip up LCD screen on the go.

Electronic games and toys that work to teach while kids play--and if you're interested in some tips, the VTech site has a handful of tips for stress-free holiday living. And I think the last one said something about online shopping . . .

And this weekend, courtesy of VTech, I have a Cyber Pocket to give away to a random winner! Talk about starting your holidays off on a good foot. Good luck!

Here's how to win:

Before 12 am Monday morning go to the giveaway entry form on this page and enter your name and email. I will pick one of the names at random, contact the winner via their email and publish the winner's first name and home town in next Tuesday's post. See the bottom of the entry form for more details.

This giveaway is open to all readers! Good luck!

Someone I'd Like You to Meet: Amanda from Oh Amanda

Our Write-Away Contest guest judge this month was Amanda from Oh Amanda, a wonderful person who writes about her two children, her home, her creativity and her religion with a comfortable openness that invites you in.

When I interview people sometimes I'll focus my questions on things that interest my guest and then sometimes I'll focus on things I'm thinking about myself and you can tell by a few of my questions where some of my thoughts have been lately . . . Christmas is right around the corner!

Amanda, I hope you're having a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend!

***

You’ve been blogging for several years now, how do you deal with the ups and downs of blogging?
I've always said I love the ebbs and flows of blogging. It's MY blog and MY life so I can kinda do with it what I want. When I'm busy, my blog reflects that. When I'm focused and inspired, my blog reflects that, too. I also think it's the ups and downs that spur me on. When I feel blaze about my blog or my readers or stats or "influence" it makes me want to push harder and do better.

Have your goals with your blog changed? How?
When I first started my blog I thought it was a creative writing outlet. But I remember my very first post and I can hear that I also hoped someone would read it. And I'm continually surprised that people do! I think this all goes back to the ebbs and flows...at one point my goal was to get 3 comments. Then to make a couple of bucks. I think now my goal is to influence people--I try to post things that will be encouraging, insightful or helpful. (I don't think I always get that accomplished, but I try!)

What has been the most fun part of your blog? What makes you want to keep with it?
The most fun part of blogging by far is the people! I've met so many different types of people. People I'm pretty sure would have never spoken to me (or vice versa) in real life--are now dear friends to me. My whole world has opened up in a new way since I've really gotten into the blogsophere. I couldn't NOT stick with it--like that old blinkie says, "I love my computer. My friends live in it."

Do you have any advice for people trying to get their blog noticed?
I wish I was an expert on this. My only advice is to be a part of the community . . . read and comment, play along with carnivals and fun parties, email your comment-ers back, respond on facebook or twitter. If you want your blog to be out there--put yourself out there! Oh, and it doesn't hurt to be cute and normal, too.

You do a lot of product reviews, what advice would you give for people who’d like to do reviews on their own blogs?
Don't take everything that comes your way. I just got an email about tissues. And although I think it would be fun to get a big box of tissues in the mail . . .what am I really accomplishing? I saved $1.42 and now I have to spend an hour or more writing a post about tissues that my readers don't even want to read. Just make sure you pick stuff you really like and would have blogged about for free. (Uhm, like Disney or chocolate.)

If you've never received a PR pitch, try signing up with a network like One2One or MomSelect. They send out emails about lots of different opportunities. You can pick and choose and not worry if it's a good company or not!

What changes, if any, have you seen in the world of blogging—especially mom blogging?
I think my blog has mirrored the blogging world as far as changes. I went from I'm-in-the-cool-geeky-crowd to wow-someone-likes-me to i-can't-believe-this-company-

likes-me to I-am-my-own-persona.

I love that blogging has mushroomed. I have to admit, sometimes I feel like it's passing me by. I am in awe that I get to be a part of your Write Away contest--you are a bloggy hero to me! But I am also feeling the "age" of my blog. I feel comfortable in my blog and I think there are many people who are recognizing the amazing platform that blogging is. I want to take full advantage of it and use it to make a difference in the lives of others. So to make a long answer even LONGER, I think the biggest change is that blogging is LOUDER. Moms have seen that a blog can be more than a journal or a way to win free stuff. Blogging can be a vehicle, a tool and an agent for change.

What are your favorite holiday traditions your family has?
As a semi-new mom (my kids are 3 and 1) I feel like our family "traditions" are all forming. And I think that's exciting. My daughter has had 3 Christmases and doesn't remember any of them. So, every year is a new sparkly treat for her. I love discovering family "traditions" with her and now with my son. I'm inspired by so many traditions and crafts and books that I think I try to many at one time!

What do you do to make the holidays more meaningful?
I'm the kind of person that likes to make events special. I want the candles lit, the music playing, the food ready to go and a few little extras thrown in. But besides the actual celebration, I want my children to know the meaning behind the holiday. I have worked hard at helping Lydia understand what it means to be thankful. We spend weeks focusing on the details of the real Christmas story. I feel like I've got a fleeting opportunity to get to her heart before the media and the craziness of the season gets it's chance--and I want to impress her first!

Do you have favorite holiday books or movies your family enjoys? I know you recently posted about Thanksgiving traditions, what about Christmas or New Year’s?
Oh my goodness, books! I could list 50 Christmas books I love. My very favorite story ever is the Gift of the Magi. I have started collecting as many different editions as I can. It's the most beautiful story of sacrifice, love, gratitude and thankfulness. It is set at Christmas time but I think the lesson is appropriate at any season. My newest favorite tradition is the advent calendar. I can't get enough of them. This year my daughter will probably be opening five advent calendars a day while we make another one! Like I said, I get excited about traditions and special events!

What kinds of things are you looking forward to in 2010?
My son will be in his first year . . . I mean his first year that he's NOT an infant! This 14-20 months age is so exciting to me because I can see a little peek into his real personality. Everything will be new and fun for him. Everything is a first. My love grows with my children and I'm excited to see how he grows and my love with him. Also, on a personal note, I'm a new Disney Mom, so I'll be on the Disney World website as part of the Disney Mom's Panel this year--a dream come true for me!

Sponsored by Pak Naks--decorate your stuff!

Happy Thanksgiving

Andrew pulled this out and had us read it as a family this week. It's Washington's official declaration of the first national day of Thanksgiving from 1789 and I thought you might also enjoy it, Happy Thanksgiving.

***

WHEREAS it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favour; and Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requsted me "to recommend to the people of the United States a DAY OF PUBLIC THANKSGIVING and PRAYER, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:"

NOW THEREFORE, I do recommend and assign THURSDAY, the TWENTY-SIXTH DAY of NOVEMBER next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favorable interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed;-- for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish Constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted;-- for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge;-- and, in general, for all the great and various favours which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also, that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions;-- to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shewn kindness unto us); and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as he alone knows to be best.

GIVEN under my hand, at the city of New-York, the third day of October, in the year of our Lord, one thousand seven hundred and eighty-nine.

George Washington

Mini Cornucopias

These are cute little favors my mother made when I was little and they're still as fun as they were twenty years ago.

Tiny little cornucopias that can be used as place settings or favors or table decorations.

To shape the horn, just gently steam a sugar cone until it softens (about a minute, be careful not to burn yourself in the steam) then bend the tip up. Hold it in place until it hardens again (just a moment or two) and then fill it with treats.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I hope your holiday is wonderful.

Sponsored by Beau-Coup for unique baby shower favors.

The Write-Away Winner

Thank you to Amanda at Oh Amanda for judging this month's writing contest, she's terrific and you'll get to read more about her later this week as I interview her.

Thank you also to Bath and Body Works for the prize package from their new antibacterial line.

But the greatest thanks to the entrants who shared their feelings on being Grateful. I hope you enjoy the entries.

. . . And the winner is:

The Chocolate Chip Waffle with Gratitude: Seeing It

Our judge said: "This was beautiful. As good as any novel I've ever read!"

Honorable Mentions

Mozi Esmé with To Be Grateful for More
"I think she really answered the question, if there was one. Such a great perspective."
Such the Spot with Whispered Reminders
"Oh, i needed this reminder today!"
Glacier Racing with Thanks to Joey
"They deserve this for the sheer volume written about a dog!! Plus, it was so articulate!"

***

Here are a list of the entries in the order they were received:

1. Glacier Racing with Thanks to Joey
I'm mourning this dog more than any of the people I've lost in the past ten years. Earlier today the grief leaked out, my body making sounds I didn't know it could. It doesn't help there's no shoulder near to cry on, or that night shift makes emotions tougher to control. Perhaps weeping is weakness, but I'm just now realizing the weight of the role he played in this simplified life I've made, and the hole that's left, and I am weak, and so I weep.

2. Lifenut with My Thanksgiving with Mick Jagger
The turkey and the stuffing were diced into tidy brown blocks. They sat side-by-side, looking like bricks for a dainty but foolhardy construction project. The mashed potatoes were scooped by hand like ice cream. Someone four floors below, in a basement kitchen, released the dull white lukewarm globe over a tray with a flourish of a tired wrist. There were stubby grey green beans and a short glass of milk with a paper lid to prevent sloshing.

3. The Time for Change with Gratitude
It's sitting there in the paper robe, staring at the ceiling, wondering, as always, what would happen if the fire alarm went of at that exact second, that it all crept up on me. While waiting in the lobby for forty-five minutes, I had worked myself up into a state of anxiety and worry. It's routine, but routine for something I try to deny, as if by denying its existence, it will suddenly disappear and never haunt me again.

4. Mozi Esmé with To Be Grateful for More
The overcast skies didn’t dampen the enthusiasm of the crowd on Wednesday as we applauded the marching bands, the Scout groups, the fire trucks, the branches of services, the veterans, and most importantly to many there, the flying candy. It felt good to be an American!

5. Blog o' Beth with Gratitude
Sometimes an argument over a toy can lead me to say ugly words, causing my bottomless patience to vanish in a flash. Sometimes the simple sound of Max’s heavy breathing at night can awake worry and concern. Sometimes the smell of Lucy’s hair as it is nestled tightly under my nose can be comforting.

6. In the Mom Zone with A Lot to Be Grateful For
There's a challenge circulating around Facebook to post one thing you are thankful for each day until Thanksgiving. Two weeks and they call it a challenge? That's only 15 things you're thankful for. Surely there's more than that to be grateful for...

7. The Holly's Family with Gratitude

1. Good parents...they raised well, I know I am loved.

2. Gospel...thank my parents here too for raising me up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints! I love the Gospel for many reasons but to be basic and not take too much space I love the Savior Jesus Christ and HIS love for me makes me want to strive to be more loving to others!

3. Siblings...they are precious and my dearest friends.

8. The Diaper Diaries with Gratitude

I have always found myself to be a glass half full kind of person. And to be honest, life hasn’t thrown me many curveballs to get down about. Life isn’t all sunshine and roses, but when I look around, it isn’t hard to see that I have been incredibly blessed. To try and act like life has been hard on me would just be insulting to those who have truly had an uphill battle.

9. School Teacher by Day, Super Hero by Night with How Sweet the Sound
Gratitude and grace go hand in hand. It takes grace to have gratitude for all that's in your life, even in those hours where you might feel lost. Truly, there is so much in my life for which I am grateful. I am grateful that even though I don't want to work outside of the home, I have a job. I am grateful for this in a tough economic time when so many would give so much that have a full-time job with good health insurance.

10. Such the Spot with Whispered Reminders
I lead a blessed life. This much I know is true. Well, most of the time anyway. Admittedly, I’ve been known to forget from time to time. If I’m being honest I will tell you that there are days when my four young blessing from above seem particularly heavy.

11. Me and Mine with I Have a Few Wrenches If You Need to Borrow One
I'd like to think of myself as the kind of person that's grateful for her trials. I was thinking about this yesterday and wondered, "Am I really grateful for them?" It's easier said than done, really. Sure, hindsight is a wonderfully safe place to be grateful for one's lessons through adversity, but what about when you're actually in the process of "learning"? Whenever my life starts to make sense and seems reasonably steady, I know it's only the calm before the storm.

12. The Chocolate Chip Waffle with Gratitude: Seeing It
I think I began to grasp the concept of gratitude when I was seventeen. The summer of 1989, before my senior year in high school, I was dumped by The Boy Friend of my young life who was going to become my husband and the father of my future children. I was sure of it.

13. Food for the Soul with Give Thanks with a GRATEFUL Heart
For the last few days I have been contemplating the theme on everyone's mind as we approach Thanksgiving Day. No, not turkey (although I have contemplated that quite a bit as well!) I'm talking about the theme of giving thanks.

14. Paula May with Gratitude to the Rescue
I've been focusing on gratitude all month. Partially because the Thanksgiving season is a perfect time to reflect on the gifts we have in our lives. Partially because I have been having a hard time coming to terms with the reality of my life as compared to where I think it should be.

15. The Mommy Machine with Grateful
When I say my in-laws live a few towns away, I'm not talking about an hour's drive through the suburbs. Because we reside in Alaska, a visit to Grandma's house involves a half-day's journey over 370 miles and a trek across the marsh, up the mountain, into the pass, over the river, and through the woods. Service stations are few and far between—even if we manage to make it to a gas station, the restrooms aren't always working.

16. Fractured Toy with One More Day
I wished that she would not see tomorrow. I wished my mother's life away. I dressed in the dark and I drove there in the darkness. I quietly put the key in the lock and entered her house, praying that I wouldn't awaken her. I knew she would be asleep in the back bedroom and yes, I could see the night light from the living room. Would tonight be the night? Would tonight be the night I'd watch my mother die?

Sponsored by K & M Studios and photographer Megan Burgess

How Much Is Enough?

This time of year we're given a paradox: Thanksgiving is the season for gratitude yet before the turkey is even cold we're bombarded by advertisers telling us we can't make it through the holiday celebrations without buying things. Lots of things, and the more the better.

So we're supposed to be grateful but not so grateful that we don't want lots more.

Which brings me to the subject of contentment. I'm not one to say that there is virtue in always being satisfied with who or what we are because that's what sets us apart as human beings. We want to do better, to be more, to reach higher, to discover new things and strive for greatness but there is a difference between being complacent and being content.

Complacency inspires laziness by convincing you that doing better isn't important or that being more is worthless. Contentment is the ability to ignore what someone may be telling you need so you can focus on what's truly necessary. Being content is to look at the place where you live and not become agitated if it isn't decorated in the latest style, it's being able to accept what you've been given and not look at what your neighbor has instead.

It's the perfect week to share an article I recently read on Being Content with Our Homes and it could apply to so many of the toys and treats we're supposed to desperately crave nowadays. Electronics, vacations, clothing, fame, prestige and cars--not just homes.

If we learn nothing else from the economic destruction we've experienced this year let it be contentment. To be happy with the abundance we've been given and not to exceed our means looking for more because to be truly grateful starts with being content--you can't feel gratitude until you're content with what you've been given.

Sponsored by Pak Naks--decorate your stuff!

Dijon Chicken Stew with Kale

This recipe was from an old Cooking Light and it thrilled me for a couple reasons. First, it is probably the best-tasting chicken stew I've ever had and second it had kale in it.

I'd never cooked or eaten kale before (shocking I know) but greens have never been my thing. I'll eat spinach if it's pureed in ravioli or chopped very finely as an ingredient. But straight up wilted leaves? Never.

But I was in the mood for something new and being well aware of how healthy kale is for you I decided to give it a whirl and I was pleased by the results.

It got a round of thumbs up and I made an extra large pot to last for several meals. LOVED it.

6 teaspoons olive oil, divided
2 sliced leeks, green parts only
1 1/2 tablespoons garlic cloves, minced
1/2 cup all-purpose flour, divided
2 pounds cubed chicken
1 teaspoon salt, divided
1/2 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper, divided
6 cups fat-free, less-sodium chicken broth, divided
4 tablespoons white wine vinegar
2 cups water
3 tablespoons Dijon mustard
3 cups (1/2-inch) cubed peeled white potato
6 cups loosely packed torn kale

Heat 1 tablespoon oil in a cast iron skillet over medium-high heat. Add leek and sauté 6 minutes or until tender and golden. Add garlic and sauté 1 minute. Set aside.

Place 1/3 cup flour in a bowl with 1/4 teaspoon salt and 1/2 teaspoon pepper. Roll chicken in flour, scooping it out of the excess. Heat remaining 2 tablespoons oil over high heat. Add half of chicken cubes. Cook 5 minutes, browning on all sides. Then brown remaining chicken and add to leek mixture.

Add 1 cup of broth and vinegar to pan, scraping bottom to loosen browned bits. Transfer to a stock pot. Combine 1 cup broth and remaining flour, stirring with a whisk until smooth. Add to stock pot with remaining broth, water and mustard to pan. Stir in chicken mixture and potato, remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt, and remaining 1/4 teaspoon black pepper. Bring to a boil. Cover, reduce heat and simmer 30 minutes more or until potato is tender. Stir in kale; cover and simmer 10 minutes.

Sponsored by Beau-Coup for unique baby shower favors.

HP TouchSmart 600 Giveaway

Biggest giveaway ever! Got your attention? Good, because the rules are a little different from previous giveaways so read all the information carefully.

The HP TouchSmart 600-1055 is a desktop PC where, as the name implies, you can touch the screen to manipulate information. It comes with all the stuff you desperately covet with the bonus of being able to pinch, rotate and drag things anywhere you want with your own little fingers. Is that not completely fun?

Windex not included.

However, there are other spiffy features that it does include:

• built-in adjustable webcam, wireless modem, microphone and premium speakers
• wireless keyboard and mouse
  
• HDMI gaming console so you can play your Playstation, X-box or Wii in HD
  
• 23" HD 16:9 screen plus HDTV tuner with a remote
• capabilities for viewing Blu-ray discs plus viewing or burning DVDs
• 750 GB hard drive
• TouchSmart Live TV, Windows Media Center and Windows 7 software
  

With the Windows 7 Play To feature you can set music to play throughout your home audio system. Or, with the TouchSmart Live TV feature and the optional TV tuner you can even record TV programs. I believe the word for that is "suh-weet."

It also comes with a bundle of five Microsoft Surface programs that teach you to use the new TouchSmart screen to full potential so you can easily run sites like Twitter, Pandora or Netflix. Gives a new meaning to poking people on Facebook, doesn't it?

So if you think about it, you're not just getting a regular old PC to manage information, you're also getting a command center for your entire entertainment and social media system.

And if this doesn't get you drooling I noticed that on the HP site you can get about $200 worth of extras, including free shipping, a $120 rebate and $60 off one of HP's wireless printers. Good deal.

I'm so excited because HP has generously offered to give one of these snazzy new machines free to one of you just in time for the holidays so read all the directions carefully for your shot at this beauty.

Here's how to win:

Before 12 am, the morning of Saturday November 28th (you get a full week for this one) go to the giveaway entry form on this page and enter your name and email. I will pick one of the names with a random number generator, contact the winner via their email and publish their first name and home town on Tuesday December 1st.

You can only enter once via the form. However, if you share this giveaway or the HP link to the product through Twitter, Facebook, by emailing this post to a friend (see envelope icon at the bottom) or by putting up this button on your site please leave me a comment letting me know that you did so and I will gladly enter your name a second time.

Code:
<a href="http://scribbit.blogspot.com/2009/11/hp-touchsmart-600-giveaway.html"><img alt="HP TouchSmart 600 Giveaway" src="http://i37.photobucket.com/albums/e98/amitton/x-1.jpg" title="HP TouchSmart 600 Giveaway" border="0" /></a>


When you click on the entry form link there are even more minute details at the bottom if you have questions. This giveaway is open to all readers so good luck!

Ugliest Animals on Earth

We've had our share of animals around here--hamsters and parakeets, frogs and fish, but these guys are pets for people who want to be just a little different than your average animal lover. To be honest, these are the animals that make a pretty good case for natural selection.

1. sphynx cat
These guys inspire nothing but pity in me--they didn't grow this way they were specifically bred not to have any hair which of course makes them rather cold and eager to cuddle with other animals and humans. Poor things.

They were bred in the 1960s and now there are several different strains including Mexican hairless. Why Mexican? Not sure. All the Mexican people I know have plenty of hair.

2. proboscis monkey
Proboscis means "nose." Not sure why someone thought that was appropriate but for whatever reason it's stuck.

Living in Borneo, only the males have such large facial characteristics and when they get angry their noses swell with blood and get all red. I'm really, really glad that humans don't have this particular characteristic as well. Really glad.

3. warthog
The animal world's answer to body piercing.

I actually don't know much about these guys, I had to look it up and found that they live in Africa (obviously I haven't seen The Lion King enough or I would have figured it out on my own). What The Lion King doesn't tell you is that they can run and jump pretty well and sometimes kill lions with those tusks of theirs. Take that Simba.

4. California condor
The rush to save these birds from extinction was the most expensive conservation effort in history and I won't say anything more about that. I think the picture speaks for itself. Condors are one of the longest living birds, surviving fifty years. Seems that I heard parrots last forever too--but condors are one of the rarest with only about 300 alive.

Because the world needs all the gigantic, bald, hideous, meat-eating flying scavengers it can get.

5. Irish lord
We catch these periodically out in Resurrection Bay when we're halibut fishing, they're a deep-water fish that are truly hideous in a way that deserves a round of applause.

Spiny, big mouthed, bulging and nasty the only thing that makes these guys uglier is if you pull them up too fast and they kind of explode from the change in pressure. Not pretty.

6. axolotl
I'm not a fan of salamanders in general, they're slimy and rather creepy with their underwater thing and the gills and the not-quite-fish-yet-not-quite-lizard issue. The axolotl lives in Mexico and is facing problems from shrinking habitats and polluted waters (I'm trying to feel some sympathy here) but in Japan they've got an enormous salamander cousin that is something like four feet long.

Can you imagine swimming in some quiet pool and coming across a four foot salamander? I know they're not dangerous but I would completely flip out if one of those bumped up against me.

7. elephant seal
Whenever the word "elephant" is used as an adjective you know the results aren't going to be pretty.

And this is even the guy's good side.

8. star nosed mole
You kind of have to take your hats of to this one, he's so ugly, so freaky-looking, so artistically disturbing that he really deserves a prize.

I've never seen one in real life, never seen a regular mole either, and I guess keeping this one buried in the ground isn't a bad idea.

9. naked mole rat
I guess it really means something that all of the animals on the list are hairless, not one has a good covering except maybe the condor though it's the naked head that gets him noticed.

Naked mole rats really couldn't be uglier if you painted them green with pink spots, heck that would probably be an improvement. I've seen these at the zoo in a huddled pile and it kind of makes you question things when something so strange can survive like that.

Oops! I take that back--the monkey has hair.

10. blob fish
I think fish are over-represented in the category of Ugliest Animals, there are so many out there that you could fill three or four lists but this one really takes it.

It looks--forgive me--like a big pile of lard or a big stomach or something. Like a pile of Playdough with eyes.

I think they're a deep-water fish as well--all the ugly stuff lives way down deep--and I'm kind of glad. It's not exactly a candidate for the aquarium at the dentist's office is it?

Sponsored by K & M Studios and photographer Megan Burgess

How Not to Make Yogurt (or) So Easy a Monkey Could Do It

I should entitle this post "I Am a Doofus" because when you read this you'll agree that's what I am.

Long ago my mother had a yogurt maker and occasionally made a batch and I thought it would be a great thing to try for myself. I started with this Make Yogurt in a Crockpot recipe which not only claimed to be easy but cost effective for achieving great mounds of creamy yogurt goodness. However, what the recipe doesn't tell you is that to succeed you must have enough intelligence to remember the word "yogurt" without being distracted by the first shiny thing you see.

It's all about heating milk--which I'm quite capable of doing--but the hard part comes when you have to remember that you've got it going in the crock pot. The first batch I started I began heating it and then somewhere along the way I forgot about it and the whole batch was ruined.

So I tried again the next week and heated up another batch. Sure enough, I forgot it again and ruined it.

Third time I set timers, picked a time when I could be around to give it my full attention and I STILL forgot it and ended up ruining yet another half gallon of milk. The fourth time I tried it I was actually able to see the project through to completion but I must have done something wrong because the yogurt was hardly thicker than the whole milk was when I started and hardly tasted like yogurt.

My conclusions? That at the bottom of the recipe there ought to be a little asterisk that says *Caution, you may end up wasting enough milk to produce forty-seven batches of yogurt if you're as stupid as Michelle. Cost-effective for all but the very lowest on the IQ scale.

Sponsored by Forty Fish Eggs

A View from the Kitchen

Funny how things can change so quickly. It used to be green and now it's white. I forget what it looks like covered in snow and then once it snows I forget what it looks like when it was green.

We're dusting off our skis for the weekend.

***

Congratulations to Keriane from Anchorage, Alaska for winning the Veggie Tales and Campbell Soup Giveaway from this weekend. Woot!

Sponsored by Beau-Coup for unique baby shower favors.

No Child Left Behind. Because They ALL Need to Be Watching Television at School.

My daughter came home from high school on Friday.

"How was your day?" I asked.

"Fine. We had another substitute so we didn't do anything."

"What do you mean?"

"Whenever we have a substitute we usually don't do anything, we just watch movies. This time the sub spent the whole time online giving us internet quizzes."

"Quizzes about the subject matter?"

"No, personality quizzes, that kind of thing."

"You're kidding."

"No, once we had a guy who spent the whole time going through his text messages and last year in P.E. the teacher--not the sub--would make us lay down on the gym floor and take naps sometimes. He'd force us to close our eyes and if he thought we weren't actually sleeping he'd say he was going to dock our grade."

"So, let me get this straight--you were being graded for sleeping in Physical Education class? Not for running or exercising or playing a sport but sleeping?

"Yea, and in English class today the teacher said we'd been working hard this week so we were going to take a break so we finished up Enchanted."

"You watched Enchanted?"

"Yea, we've been watching it for a couple weeks now, we'll see a bit and then watch other video clips."

"Why are you watching Enchanted? What does that have to do with English?"

"They speak English in the movie? I don't know. Because we watch a lot of movies in German class: Ratatouille, The Incredibles, Ice Age, Finding Nemo--plus a bunch of German movies."

"Because they're speaking German?"

"I guess. We don't really pay much attention to the German part."

"How many movies do you watch a week?"

She thought a bit, counting up on her fingers and trying to remember. "Oh--I don't know--five or six, maybe more. We watch t.v. pretty much every day in at least one class and any time we have a sub they put in movies or something. We watch stuff like Mythbusters a lot and call it chemistry."

She paused a moment then said, "At least it's not like my history teacher who flirts with girls in the class then shows us pictures of himself without his shirt on and talks about his tattoos."

"He showed you pictures of himself without his shirt?"

"Yea, he was trying to show us how big his muscles were and was pointing out his tattoo and saying that we could tell the picture hadn't been fixed because you could still see his tattoo."

"Apparently working six hours a day with three months off in the summer and another month off throughout the school year isn't enough, those teachers must be exhausted. And these are your honors classes?"

"Yea, I've talked to people in the AP classes and they say it's not much different there. Sometimes the stuff we do that's supposed to be real work doesn't make any sense either. Like last year in English we were supposed to be studying the Renaissance so we read The Crystal Caves by Mary Stewart."

"Sure, because why read anything like Marlowe, Spenser, Jonson or Shakespeare when you've got cheap 1970s fantasy fiction at your fingertips? It's not even set in the Renaissance."

"I know. The projects we did had nothing to do with the Renaissance either--we do a lot of projects, especially group projects. I think it's because the teacher doesn't have to do anything to grade it like they would have to do if we actually wrote a paper or took a test. Some kid built a throne out of hockey pucks and hockey sticks and got an A."

"A hockey stick throne? How does that relate to the Renaissance?"

"It doesn't But it was cool."

"And this is public education. Run by the government. If that's not the biggest strike against a government-run health care system I don't know what is."

Sponsored by K & M Studios and photographer Megan Burgess

Apple Brie Bread with Almonds

Colder weather here means more baking and I've been baking like crazy lately.

This is a good recipe for breakfast, a nice blend of sweet and savory that is lovely with a cold glass of milk or juice--and boy does it smell nice when it's baking.

For dough:
1 cup milk
2 eggs
1/3 cup butter
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
4 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon yeast

For filling:
2 tablespoons butter, divided
4 cups diced granny smith apples
½ cup brown sugar, divided
3 tablespoons slivered almonds
4 oz brie
1 teaspoon flour

Put all the ingredients for dough in a bread machine, set on "dough" cycle. When it's finished, roll out dough in large rectangle.

Melt 1 tablespoon of butter and sauté apples over medium-high heat for 10 minutes. Add ¼ c brown sugar and cook 5 min. Remove from heat and stir in almonds.

Spoon mixture down middle of dough rectangle, cube brie and arrange along top. Make diagonal cuts along sides and braid over the filling. Let rise, then sprinkle remaining brown sugar and butter (mixed together) over top.

Cook at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.

Sponsored by Pak Naks--decorate your stuff!

Veggie Tales and Campbell's Soup Giveaway

I should probably title this "Eat Your Veggies" because that's the theme here today as Veggie Tales has released their latest DVD, "Saint Nicholas: A Season of Joyful Giving" and I've got copies to give away.

You know I can sing "Barbara Manatee" in my sleep don't you? My kids are past the Veggie Tales age but still that tune haunts me . . .

It's kind of funny that I'd be giving away DVDs this week because as it happens our DVD player gave up the ghost yesterday. Don't you know that when something breaks it somehow upsets the karma for the whole house and suddenly things are breaking all over the place . . . first it was my van, then the closet doors, then the plumbing, then my husband, then the bathroom scale (probably a blessing in disguise right now) then the DVD player. I figure we'll probably have two or three more things bite the dust before the destroying angel passes us by.

But forget that I can't watch the movie--you can if you win one of the copies I'm giving away, they'll arrive in time for Thanksgiving.

Then, for the other veggie angle I've got a gift package from Campbell's Soup which includes the following items in a sweet little green lunch tote:

• A kid-friendly juice bottle
• A set of pre-packaged lunch box cards with riddles and a space to leave a lunchtime note
• Samples of Campbell’s SpongeBob Chicken Noodle Soup
• Two bottles of V8 V-Fusion: Strawberry Banana and Pomegranate Blueberry

The juice was terrific and I think I've mentioned my weakness for SpongeBob.

So follow directions below to enter, good luck!

Here's how to win:

Before 12 am Monday morning go to the giveaway entry form on this page and enter your name and email. I will pick one of the names at random, contact the winner via their email and publish the winner's first name and home town in next Tuesday's post. See the bottom of the entry form for more details.

This giveaway is open to all readers! Good luck!

The Ultimate Geography Question

It's been a long week and I'm to the point where I can hardly speak coherently let alone write in complete sentences--this starting up a business thing feels like its kicking us around pretty thoroughly. I told Andrew I'd truly be manic depressive if only I had more time for it. . . .

So I'm going to leave you with a thought, one we spent quite a while discussing while in the car yet came to no solid conclusions on.

Pretend that you were able to drill a hole through the entire earth. Right through the middle, creating a big straight tube that ran completely down the center and out the other side. Now say, hypothetically, that you were to fall into that tunnel.

What would happen??

Of course, aside from burning up in the heat. Pretend the temperatures aren't an issue. You'd fall of course, fall for thousands of miles toward the center but once you got to the center what would happen to you? That's the part that's stumped us.

You wouldn't fall clear through and out the other side because gravity pulls you to the center. But the center is drilled away so there's no place to land. Would you just stay, suspended in the center of the earth once you reached it? Would you overshoot the center with the momentum of the fall then spring back as if you were on a big bungee cord? Would you stick to the inside of the tunnel as if it were flat ground? Someone out there must know. The truth is out there.

Spencer was the one to pose the question and it gave us a good brain squeeze.

P.S. Sorry Canada about drilling a hole practically in the middle of Halifax. Nothing personal, really.

P.S.S. If you feel you've been cheated and not recieved enough post for your money, try these great links instead:

The Best Geography Game in the World
How to Travel by Cargo Ship
How Not to Look Like an American Tourist
How to Travel the World on $35 a Day

Sponsored by Forty Fish Eggs

Chinese Yo Yos

I don't know if you've noticed, but yo yos are really hip right now. I don't suppose you would notice unless you happen to be hanging out at the local high school or have a high schooler living in your midst. But take my word for it, it's become completely acceptable to bring yo yos to high school as a means of impressing others (who knew?)

However, while regular old-fashioned American yo yos are fine the Chinese ones hold the real points for fascination and pure "wow" factor.

Andrew and I were on a cruise three years ago where there was a juggling show that included a Chinese yo yo routine and the performer taught yo yo lessons the next day and you can bet I was there. I bought one right there and the kids love sending the little cups spinning on the string.

Also called diabolos (not to be confused with diablos) they're not that common but when you see the things you can do you can understand why the Chinese are totally going to rule the world someday.

Here's a good video to show you some of the tricks you can do:

And here's a video of the kids doing it (and this clip is purely for the grandparents, feel free to ignore):

You can buy them on Amazon--a good gift for the holidays if you're starting to think about that kind of thing . . .

***

Have you entered this month's Write-Away Contest? It goes perfectly with a side of stuffing--the topic is "Grateful" and time is ticking away . . .

Sponsored by Beau-Coup for unique baby shower favors.

Killer Bunnies RULE!

We love games here, LOVE them. Our favorites (which I've mentioned before) are Settlers of Catan, Spy Alley, Hearts, President and Scum, Five Card Mao, and now . . . Killer Bunnies.

Technically the full name is "Killer Bunnies and the Quest for the Magic Carrot" and we're playing it all the time lately. We don't have a game of our own, I've been mooching off my sister who has one (though Amazon has it on sale for $20.50 which is a STEAL I tell you) and borrowing it to play with our friends who seem to like it as much as we do.

Anyway, it's a strange game. A card game but not at all your typical card game. Each card in the deck is unique, reminding me of 60s psychedelic album art and it's a nice blend of luck, strategy and humor (we love the humor).

The way you win is to collect carrots. You want to be lucky and get the one carrot that is randomly and secretly designated as the winning carrot so the more carrots you get, the better your odds of being having one of your carrots be the winning carrot. You accumulate carrots by maintaining bunnies, not always easy to do because while you're trying to keep your own bunnies alive everyone else is trying to kill them off with weapon cards that range in potency from Whisks to Flame Throwers to Black Holes.

Each card is a different weapon or protection and you try to play protection cards (like Heavenly Halos) on your bunnies while keeping other people from releasing Ebola weapons and wiping our your litter. Very fun.

And, as with many great games, you can get expansion sets to make things even more intriguing. I haven't played with an expansion set . . . maybe I can talk my sister into getting one so I can borrow it from her. That's what family is for, right?

***

Have you entered this month's Write-Away Contest? It goes perfectly with a side of stuffing--the topic is "Grateful" and time is ticking away . . .

And congratulations to Brittany of Paramus, New Jersey for winning last weekend's cookie cutter and mittens giveaway. She's quite ready for winter now. For those who did not win this time, you can still get 10% off at Ann Clark Ltd on your cookie cutter order by entering the code BLGA7 at checkout.

Sponsored by K & M Studios and photographer Megan Burgess

A Winter Mountain Tour of Anchorage

Snow! It's finally snowed! November 8th--which makes our snow contest winner Cindy.

I had to go up on the hillside on Saturday and I snapped some pictures just for you--those these were taken on Saturday before our house saw any accumulation.

This is a picture of Cook Inlet from the southwestern edge of town close to my parents' home where I grew up. You can see the bluff with the birch and spruce in the foreground (great places for frog hunting down there) then beyond that are the mudflats. We'd never go out that far because it's easy to get stuck then drown when the tide comes in.

Then past that is the ocean and the southeastern end of the Alaska Range, one of the largest mountain ranges in the state. Denali, (or Mt. McKinley) the highest peak in North America, is in the middle of the range and about 300 miles from Anchorage and easily visible on a clear day though you can't see it from where I was at, you have to be on the north side of town or going north on the highway to get a good look at it.

In the top picture you can see the dark spot that is Fire Island which is an uninhabited stretch that sits out in the Inlet across from the city.

This is a Mt. Susitna, directly across from Anchorage to the west. For some reason it hasn't got any snow yet but you can see why Susitna means "sleeping lady"--can you see her lying on her back looking up at the sky with her hair flowing out to the left?


Anchorage is completely surrounded by mountains. If you go clockwise around the city, backing us up on the east where I was standing when I took this shot are the Chugach mountains, one of the largest national parks and has the highest concentration of glaciers in the country, covering 30,000 square miles. The warm air comes across those mountains, down through the pass toward the south and when cools as it gets to the other side it dumps huge amounts of snow and rain on Valdez, down in the Prince William Sound area (where the Exxon Valdez spill was located?)

Then, farther south are the Kenai Mountains, moving around to the southwest are the Aleutian Mountains (home to Mt. Redoubt, one of two active volcanoes you can see from town), then the Alaska Range starts about due west of us and continues around along the north side. In between the Alaska Range and Anchorage are also the Talkeenta Mountains of the Matanuska-Susitna valley and the less-well known Tordrillo Mountains where Mt. Spurr is located (the other of the two active volcanoes). Six mountain ranges, two active volcanoes, the highest mountain in North America and the ocean all in one spot. Quite a view.


This picture shows the Seward Highway, the main road running north to south through the city and this southern view shows the Kenai Mountains with their dusting of snow. I'm including it because I was out about 1 or 2 o'clock in the afternoon but the heavy cloud cover made it so dark and gloomy that you can see the headlights on already. You can see the line of the clouds in most of the pictures directly overhead.

The darkness is coming . . .

***

Have you entered this month's Write-Away Contest? It goes perfectly with a side of stuffing--the topic is "Grateful" and time is ticking away . . .

Sponsored by Pak Naks--decorate your stuff!

Perfect Thanksgiving Stuffing

I've been saving this recipe to share for over a year now. Stuffing is my very most favorite part of the whole entire Thanksgiving feast. It is what I save my precious stomach space for each year and what I cannot get in adequate quantities the other 364 days.

But . . . there is a downside to the whole issue. Stuffing is not as popular with the heathen dogs I live with. Good news is that I get to gorge unfettered until I've eaten enough stuffing to be properly considered stuffed in my own right. The bad news is that I don't get to do it very often because of the objections I meet when it's on the table--they'll tolerate it only when there are other things like mashed potatoes on the menu. As if you can't get dumb ol' mashed potatoes anywhere.

Rotten, I know, but what are you going to do?

Well at least I can share this recipe with you. Stuffing is the most highly personal part of the whole Thanksgiving meal and here I am, opening up to share it with you. I couldn't offer any more, it's like handing over a piece of me.

5 tablespoons butter
2 large sweet onions such as vidalia or Maui onions
1 pound sliced crimini mushrooms
2 cups VERY finely chopped celery (I despise large chunks)
1/4 cup minced garlic
3 cups chicken broth
1 tablespoon sage
dash of summer savory
1 tablespoon fresh rosemary
salt and pepper to taste
10 cups dried bread cubes (I like rye or sourdough myself)
5 6-ounce jars marinated artichoke hearts, diced
1 pound browned pork sausage, crumbled
1 cup grated Parmesan cheese

Saute the onions, mushrooms, celery and garlic in the butter over a medium heat until golden brown and soft (about 20-25 minutes). Don't cook on high heat to cheat.

Add 1/2 cup broth and deglaze pan, stirring up browned bits and reducing slightly. Add the sage, savory, rosemary salt and pepper and stir another five minutes.

In a large bowl add the veggie/broth mix to the bread crumbs followed by the artichokes and Parmesan. Stir to combine and, with a gentle hand, add the broth little by little until it's the proper consistency--not too wet and clumpy, not too dry. Just enough to wet down the whole mix. At this point you can refrigerate the mix overnight if you choose (and I usually choose, it's much more convenient that way).

Use it to stuff a 15-20 pound turkey and if there is leftover stuffing, cook in a greased casserole dish separately for about 30 minutes, covered. Then when the turkey comes out and sits for 15 minutes (make sure your turkey sits for 15 minutes before carving to set the juices) take off the cover and brown it up for 15 minutes.

***

Have you entered this month's Write-Away Contest? It goes perfectly with a side of stuffing--the topic is "Grateful" and time is ticking away . . .

Sponsored by Forty Fish Eggs

Ann Clark Cookie Cutters and BearHands Mittens Giveaway

I've got a great snowy-day prize package here for you today, first Ann Clark, Ltd. has sweet little cookie cutters in all sorts of shapes--tea cups, dragonflies, high heel shoes, and--of course--holiday cutters. Copper and stainless steel.

This prize, courtesy of Ann Clark, has a set of six holiday cutters in a pretty little gift box like you see here. Love that moose!

Second, BearHands makes the cutest kid-warming mittens shaped like bear hands--get it? Bare hands? Anyway, in all colors and so many sizes they promise to be the "it" thing to cover those precious paws.

Cookies? Mittens? Now all we need is some snow!

Here's how to win:

Before 12 am Monday morning go to the giveaway entry form on this page and enter your name and email. I will pick one of the names at random, contact the winner via their email and publish the winner's first name and home town in next Tuesday's post. See the bottom of the entry form for more details.

This giveaway is open to all readers! Good luck!

Making Tough Calls

It's odd how your emotions are amplified by your children. Instead of being a solitary being slogging your way through life, you have these little satellites sending signals your way; when they're happy, you're happy and when they hurt, you hurt.

Our family has had all sorts of things going on lately, Andrew is working long, hard hours to get this company of his off the ground, I'm working long hours myself, we're tightening our belts until we can get a paycheck (it's been two and a half months and counting) and along with all the typical issues you have as parents we've had one particular thing that has us lying awake at night.

Our children have gone to a particular school that we've been happy with (in general) but our 7th grade son this year didn't want to go to middle school there like his sister, he wanted to go to the neighborhood middle school we're zoned for. I wasn't thrilled about him switching but I do believe in allowing children as much of a chance to make their own decisions as is prudent and since he felt so strongly about it I told him if he could pull his grades up we'd let him switch.

He worked like crazy and got straight A's his last semester of 6th grade and we kept our word and transferred him. Our thinking was that while we didn't like the larger, less personal, less academic environment of the new school most of the boys he knew through church went there and since he's a bit of an introvert transferring him might be a good way to introduce him to some good friends.

So we held our breaths and signed the papers. He started in August and it wasn't too long before we started to notice some changes.

First, let me say here that my clinical research shows that junior high is absolutely the vilest time of a person's life. There is nothing like that 7th or 8th grade year to convince a person that the world is out to get them and that anything their parents did to build them up those previous years must have been a complete lie because their life stinks.

So we are up against a cliff as it is but besides the issues of the age we began to see subtle differences--suddenly we were hearing that "only nerds get good grades" and he was coming home asking about words and phrases he'd heard--words you'd hope would be reserved for married people, but who would have the courtesy not to use them--and sporting some very interesting fashion statements. Because you see, instead of the boys he knew from church welcoming him to the school they rejected him. They made fun of his clothes, his hair, called him names and generally made him feel like dirt so that he looked around and found some new friends, friends that have been teaching him all sorts of new attitudes.

It's been subtle--only ten weeks--but already we've seen a change in him and not one we've welcomed. Yes I realize that it is the age of change but still . . . I can only describe it as a dark cloud settling over our son. So we began to examine our options. After searching and talking and even praying we felt strongly that the best thing to do was to take him back to the original school.

The decision was the hardest decision I ever made in my life, hands down. Hard because I know my son and I knew that moving him back would kill him--he would hurt like he'd never hurt before and I worried if it would ruin our relationship. He'd feel betrayed, he'd feel angry and upset and I wondered if making this change wouldn't cause more damage. I kicked myself for ever letting him change schools in the first place, I ranted about the cruelty of the boys who were supposed to have been kind, I went through all the fears and worries but when it came right down to it, I knew that moving him back was the best thing.

Well after we'd come to the decision I wondered if there would even be a spot available for him, there's typically a very long waiting list and you can't just get back in without going through the lottery again but when I called the principal she gave me the last remaining spot they had. He was in. One strangely vacant spot left and he got it.

So then we stewed about when to tell him. We worried and put it off until we knew it had to be done and when we told him I swear I've never ached for any of my children like I did then. I would do anything for him, would sacrifice anything, but to have to sit there and tell him what I knew would hurt so much was horrible.

I know this is stretching on forever but I'm writing it mainly because it's been a week, today was his first day back at the old school, but with seven days under our belts now I've been able to see some valuable lessons from the experience.

1. Observe, interact and love. Not necessarily in that order.
It's not enough to just make sure they're fed, dressed and wearing their seat belts, you can't just assume that everything is fine--especially when we are all so busy in our separate lives. Watching for changes, watching for warning signs, looking for good signs, looking for improvement, looking for hints of problems, just watching is critical. Then with that watching goes the interaction where you talk with them, ask about them, keep those lines open so that when there are problems they'll come to you and you'll know them well enough to recognize when they are in trouble.

It's not spying, it's not distrust, it's being engaged and it shows that you love them, and oddly enough they recognize that it's a sign of love rather than an attempt to annoy if done properly.

2. Kids need reasons.
When we sat down to deliver the bad news it was easy to make one of two mistakes: you can tell your child to do something "because I say so," insisting on obedience for the sake of obedience and the parental authority or, to try to convince them that you're right. You talk too much in an effort to convert them because you can't bear to have them angry at you. Both ways are wrong.

Children need to know why you're making decisions, which of course means that you'd better have thought about your reasons before it comes up, and they need to know why you're taking a certain approach but not so you can be popular.

When we talked with our son we told him our decision. We didn't try to convince him we were right, we figured that was probably a lost cause. Instead, we told him what we were going to do and how it was because of our concerns which we then outlined in as much detail as his age allowed. We expressed a lot of empathy and spent a long time telling him how much we loved him, how it wasn't a punishment but that we loved him enough to want to protect him and help him.

He didn't understand our concerns because, frankly, he hasn't a clue about what is out there, but in the end he was able to accept our decision when we said, "This is going to be hard, we know, we're going to be here to help you through it and we wouldn't do it if we weren't absolutely sure that it would be safer and better. We love you enough to want you safe and this is something where you're not going to see the full picture until you're older. None of us may see the whole picture for a long time and it's going to take faith that it's the right thing to do."

He didn't understand why we were worried but he did know we loved him and he trusted us enough to take it on faith that we were doing what we thought was best.

3. Tackle of problems early on--don't procrastinate and hope they'll go away.
While Andrew and I worried about what to do we kept coming back to the fact that while it was going to be a nasty thing to deal with it was much better to do it now than to wait six months, a year, two years and have it confirmed that we should have done something.

I looked at our options. If we left him at the school and let him ride it out he might be fine. He could make it through and never have any damage BUT . . . the signs seemed to indicate there was at least a certain amount of danger so why risk it? Why take the chance and wait until the problem was big enough that we couldn't deal with it? The pain he'd experience now would be nothing compared to what it could be--it's like vaccinating your children. Yes, a shot hurts, yes there is a tiny amount of danger associated with it, but the risks and pain of getting polio, diphtheria or measles are so much greater than the risk and pain of the shot.

4. There can be positive outcomes from painful experiences.
Yesterday I asked him how he was feeling--on a scale of one to ten, ten being you've just scored the winning touchdown and are being carried off the field on shoulders and one being you've just been run over by a truck. He said that Monday night he was a one but then by Tuesday morning up to two and by Thursday he was a five or six. He's had dips here and there but it's getting better.

To speak frankly, one of the things we're trying to teach him is how to deal with bad times in life--like losing your job?--and if he can find the spiritual strength to get through this then that's a good lesson. I know it's early but already I can see hints that he's been finding that peace and strength that comes from faith and prayer.

Also, like with many trials, it's a chance for the family to rally around. He may feel he has no friends, he may hate going to school or feel like the world is against him but if he can come home and feel that he's safe, that here he has friends who will do anything for him and love him that can keep him going. He's seen how his brother and sisters are being nice to him to try and help him through this, how they're giving him the last slice of pizza at dinner.

The point is, that when one of us is hurting then the rest of us are there to help and comfort. Even under the best circumstances the friends he makes in junior high will most likely never be in his life later on but his family? We'll be here forever. So if this little bit of hurt strengthens our family relationships that's not a bad thing.

5. Don't be afraid to make the hard calls. It's what you're paid to do.
I've known people who say that children should be able to make all their own choices. I disagree. Instead, it is my job as a mother to teach them to make their own choices by allowing them agency in limited, steadily increasing amounts toward the goal of independence and wisdom but until they're old enough to make all of their own decisions there are many things that it is my job to decide.

We allowed our son to decide if he wanted to transfer schools at the beginning because there was no reason at the time why that would be a bad idea. But once the warnings were there it was our job to step in and make the tough call to transfer back that he couldn't make for himself. His part of the decision came when he realized that he had to decide how he was going to handle this--was he going to throw a fit? Get angry? Hold a grudge? Or was he going to let us help him through this, to make the best of things and trust his parents?

It's easy to be so afraid of the confrontation that you chicken out and the tough calls never get made but if you don't make them, who will?

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